Death of a Unicorn

This intends to be a horror-comedy (the trailer played pretty funny), but it’s executed like a straight-forward horror creature-feature. It also intends to stick-it to the rich, but the need for a body count means that some misguided scientists and employees also get horned. What remains is a horror movie that’s not very scary and a comedy that’s not very funny. The premise is the strongest part of this. Themes involving pillaging the natural world to monetize important medical cures make for satisfying impalings. The cast, especially Rudd and Ortega, are up to the task. But it won’t resonate. There’s a magical Sam Raimi-ish, Bruce Campbell-ish ingredient that’s lacking.

Inside Out 2

The teenager trying to fit in and befriend the cool kids, while shunning her old, nerdy friends is a typical movie problem. We’ve seen it 10 million times in every third film throughout film history. But Pixar knows how to make shit poignant, and they do a graceful, bang-up job here. While not as surprising as the first movie, this natural sequel is executed masterfully.

Black Bag

This is one of those movies where you have to pay really close attention in the first 10 minutes or you’ll be lost the whole time. Unfortunately, I saw this at the Alamo Drafthouse and there was all kinds of commotion and drink orders and stuff, so I was a little behind. Long, dimly-lit dinner scenes dominate the plot. Soderbergh and company expertly tell this bickery, low-action spy story well, but it’s not much of an adrenalin rush. Secrets are overheard, lies are told, and doubts are expressed. The stakes are high because the secret spy software could cause a nuclear meltdown, but that’s all offscreen. The real onscreen weapon is Cate Blanchett’s cheekbones, which seem especially pointy and chiseled here, which either means she had too much of something injected, or it was purposely done by the filmmakers to make us suspect she’s the villain. Either way, the moral of the story is solid: if you’re married, stick together and you may fall into a small bit of unaccounted-for spy money.

The Monkey

In the lexicon of Stephen King movies, there’s pre-Misery and post-Misery (with exceptions). This feels like a pre-Misery, non-Kubrickian adaptation, chock-full of overacting, goofy supporting characters, and playful violence. You don’t really have a lot to think about on the drive home, here. Death is coming and you can’t stop it. Also, toy monkeys are creepy.