Doug's Favorite Movies of 2011

Rango
Rise of the Planet of the Apes
Shame
The Descendants
Cedar Rapids
Win Win
Hugo
Midnight in Paris
Jeff Who Lives at Home
Contagion
Horrible Bosses

Honorable Mention:

The Adventures of Tintin
Source Code
X-Men: First Class
50/50
Dragonslayer
Melancholia

The Adventures of Tintin

Who is Tintin? Is he a boy? Is he a man? Where are his parents? Thankfully, Spielberg doesn’t answer any of these questions as he hurls his audience head first into one chase after another, each more gravity-defying and hair-raising than the last. There’s a motorcycle chase through a town featuring some of the most Wile E. Coyote, high-wirey insane minutes ever conceived for a movie. The 3-D is crisp, the pace is brisk, and the sum of the parts is greater than the whole. I’ve always said Spielberg is an excellent director of sequences, which is abundantly clear in Tintin. But there is a cohesiveness that’s missing, as is subconscious desire of Tintin’s that leaves the emotional core of the movie lacking. It’s still an amazing movie and really worth seeing. (Even though it’s no Rango. But hey, what is?)

My Week With Marilyn

Marilyn Monroe is the least important part of this. She’s the complication for the protagonists, a narrator, Eddie Redmayne, and Sir Laurence Olivier, played by Kenneth Branagh. In what is ultimately a very good movie, the filmmakers go out of their way to explain that in spite of all of the problems she caused, Monroe was a movie star in every way, and was therefore worth the trouble. But if this movie could have another title, it would be called “Untreated Addiction.” So many of her quirks and problems, from the littlest things all the way up to her miscarriage, were obviously caused by a serious abuse of pills. Filmmakers give us a happy ending. Olivier gets the film he wants and the narrator gets a good story to tell. But in spite of the fact that this chapter of Monroe’s life winds up okay, we all know the rest of the story ends in tragedy.

The Artist

It’s amazing how much a good, old-fashioned happy ending can make a movie joyful and memorable. While many critics and reports refer to The Artist as a “silent” film, in truth, it’s a film about the silent film era that uses sound sparingly. The black and white film stock, the music, the performances, and the Hollywood locations elevate this to an Oscar worthy favorite. But the thing no one will dare admit is it’s really the silent film gimmick that’s getting people into theaters. Not that there’s anything wrong with selling a movie based on a gimmick, as long as it’s good, which it is. But you can’t really say it’s daring, or truly original. It is, however, definitely entertaining.

The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo

Didn’t I just see this movie a year ago?? The English version of the Swedish version of the Swedish book features some excellent acting, a brisk pace, and the trademarked, gloomy Fincheresque visuals. A bigger budget and more appealing movie stars makes this a must-see for anyone who hasn’t read the books or seen the Swedish films. If you have seen the other movies, while this is still a good movie, it might give you a feeling of déjà vu.

Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows

Sherlock Holmes knows Kung fu. That is all.

Shame

It’s a courageous and unflinching drama of one of the great human taboos; a man is sexually attracted to his sister. Does his attraction to his sister make him a sex addict? Or does the fact that he’s a sex addict make him attracted to his sister? Shame dares to ask forbidden questions, and dares to portray these questions cinematically and visually. The leads, Michael Fassbender and Carey Mulligan, deliver brave and naked performances, eliciting such sympathy that by the final third of the movie you start to wish they would just sleep together and get it over with. The only way this movie could have been more daring and courageous is if the leads weren’t so physically attractive. Otherwise, in a slew of sequels, remakes, and safe historical adaptations, Shame is a truly unique movie. Never sexually unsavory but always trail-blazingly original and refreshingly honest about the complicated sexual kindling that fuels the human condition.

Mission Impossible: Ghost Protocol

It’s everything you could possibly want in an impossible mission. Yes, Tom Cruise is crazy, but he knows how to deliver the goods, and the sequences during which he hangs from tall things are thrilling. My gripe: there are scenes that happen off screen that need to be awkwardly explained by the characters later. But it’s not really about the plot, I guess. As long as a guy is hanging by his fingernails from the tallest building in the world, you feel like you’re getting your money’s worth.

Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy

Gary Oldman plays a proper English spy trying to flush-out a mole in his clandestine spy agency. I’m certain there are literary types, cinephiles, and British people who’ll be able to follow the plot and find this movie subtle and brilliant. The acting is very important-sounding and production design is impeccably drab. So, I apologize if I sound like a typical, guns-a-blazin' American, but I found this to be a little too “Masterpiece Theatre.” There were moments, brief moments, when it got vibrant; stylish even. But there’s a lot of gray and a lot of whispering in between… I’d rather watch Homeland.

The Muppets

A perfectly pleasant movie featuring the old characters with slightly newer voices. It’s fun to see all the Hollywood locations, too. It’s not really a classic, but it invokes a lot of nostalgia. And nostalgia feels good.

Hugo

It’s Scorsese’s first movie without Leo DiCaprio in about 12 years. (I’m not counting documentaries.) If you held it up to any of his other movies, you’d be hard pressed to find any similarities. And as much as I loved After Hours and greatly admired The Departed, this might be one of the best movies in his career. There is a love of kids, a love of movies, and a love of making movies fused into Hugo at the subatomic level. There is such a love of things here; it’s more Spielberg than Spielberg. He’s fortunate to have, as his source material, many of his storyboards and conceptual drawings already finished. Every camera move he’s ever done in any movie ever has led him to this point. It’s hard to tell where the computer assist takes over for the actual movie camera. The result is a technical masterpiece. I did find the pace to be a little inconsistent. Important moments that require some breathing room breeze by, while frivolity seems to be lingered upon. (I find the pace of Boardwalk Empire to be a little pokey, too.) Emotionally, Scorsese definitely seems more comfortable evoking fear and anger, rather than sentiment. But the design, the color, the movement and the acting left me astonished. Even the 3-D was good! It wasn’t too dark. When he dies, which will hopefully be a long time from now, and the entertainment press plays all the clips from his films eulogizing his great body of work, it’ll be hilarious to see clips of Hugo along side Taxi Driver.

A Dangerous Method

A slightly boring and talky costume drama about Freud and Jung and their relationship with one particular patient. However, it’s Cronenberg, so thankfully it does get a little kinky. But only a little. The cast here is great. There are intimate and fully realized portrayals from all the leads, including an expert range of restraint and emotion from the new leading man Michael Fassbender. Kiera Knightly also manifests a startlingly honest and barely-controlled crazy person, a victim of abuse who benefits and then shares the techniques developed by Freud and Jung. The movie explores but never judges the complicated relationships that shrinks can have with their patients, back to and including the very first of the head-shrinkers. A more interesting history than drama, it’s worth seeing, but only after a coffee or two.

The Descendants

He doesn’t make a lot of movies, but when he does Alexander Payne always delivers. He’s done satires and dramedies to perfection. Descendants is no exception. Payne and his casting team seem to be as careful with casting the supporting players as they are about casting their leads. There are great performances all around, including a revelation by Judy Greer. But, it’s not meant to be as funny as his other movies. In fact, there are many moments that are quite sad and serious, dealing with death, grief, betrayal, and the very serious matter of the Hawaiian heritage. Is it Payne's best? Nope. Sideways still holds that title. Is it Clooney’s best? Nope. But he’s still great in the movie as the sturdy, average dad. But it’s really good. Payne, the cast, and the crew take their story-telling really seriously. They respect their audience and I have nothing but gratitude.

Immortals

The stakes are always high when gods, demigods and titans battle for control of the Earth and its weakling population. It’s hard to imagine the battles of gods, but the all-form-and-no-function director Tarsem has a lot of fun when the battles wind up in cramped narrow hallways and elaborately carved caves. Mickey Roarke was deliciously rotten as the power-hungry villain, and the rest of the cast managed not to embarrass themselves. I couldn’t really summarize the plot if I had a gun to my head, even minutes after the movie ended. But it was fun to be in the moment and watch as one demigod beheads another demigod, as the deep crimson blood flies in slow motion across the screen to the tune of some important-sounding music.

The Skin I Live In

I’m not sure I followed the plot very clearly. It IS in Spanish, after all. But as near as I can figure it, Antonio Bandaras plays a surgeon whose daughter gets raped. He kidnaps the rapist and surgically turns him into a woman and then has sex with him/her. I’m sure this is symbolic or meaningful or something, but I couldn’t really follow what was going on.

Jeff Who Lives at Home

After a barrage of depressing movies at AFI Fest this year, the relief of seeing something upbeat was immeasurable. Jason Siegal is perfect as the apathetic and impressionable hero. Against type, Ed Helms plays the dickhead here, and his self-reflecting journey is PROFOUNDLY better than anything in those Hangover movies. Susan Sarandon has never been better as a mom open to new things. The cast is superb and the concept is profound and builds to an exciting and fitting conclusion. The comedy is heartfelt the overall feeling after the movie is positive. The Duplass brothers, the mumblecore gurus behind this, did q&a after the show, and they both came off as kind of douchey. Maybe they were just tired. Or maybe they save up any warmth or gratitude for their movies. At any rate, I liked it.

Melancholia

The first half of Lars von Trier’s latest is like a gloomy version of a Neil Simon play. Kirsten Dunst is spectacularly bi-polar as she tries to smile and dance her way through her wedding, but behind her eyes there’s a crushing despair. It’s a fierce performance, and something different than anything else she’s ever done. The supporting cast is also good, including a surprisingly solid turn from Kiefer Sutherland. Visually experiencing the movie is a bit like watching a Malick nature opus. “The Tree of Death” perhaps? At times, the pace is brutally slow, but sublime acting and visuals keep you engaged until the big finish. The movie seems to be saying that it’s okay to be depressed. Depressed people will be the ones most equipped to cope when the world ends, as it inevitably will.

Into the Abyss

The movie is much more specific than the title suggests. Into the Abyss chronicles a particular case in Texas; a crime ten years ago that lead to murder. The criminals confessed, and they’re interviewed along with many other people associated with the case. The friends of the victims and the friends and family of the culprits are all interviewed in a pretty standard “60 Minutes” fashion. Though the movie is skillfully made and definitely sheds light on larger issues about execution, it doesn't make you very sympathetic for the killers or the victims. But there are family members of the victims whose suffering will never end, and even they have their problems with capital punishment. It’s a serious and worthwhile documentary from Werner Herzog, but it could be saved for home video.

Rampart

Woody Harrelson and an all-star cast make this familiar tale of police corruption intriguing and watchable. The personal life of this narcissistic sociopath is explored considerably and the drama there is good. But how do you end a movie like this? You can’t really, not in any satisfying way. So the cup is almost full here, but maybe a quick review of Shakespeare could have given Woody’s corrupt cop the tragic ending he deserved.

Dragonslayer

A sad but compelling doc about a lowest of low-level pro skateboarder Josh Sandoval, as he struggles with poverty, drugs, alcohol, and parenthood. It’s reflective of the nation’s housing bubble that abanonded houses with empty pools make for the best skating. Therefore, a direct result of economic collapse is more skaters. I found this movie heartbreaking, but an important work of art that helps put my own life in perspective.

The Dish and the Spoon

Mumblecore muse Greta Gerwig pouts, drinks beer, and mopes her way through this meditation on infidelity. It’s emotionally ambitious and there are enjoyable moments, but there are also times where it draaaaags. Weak logic defines the resolution, too, which may be realistic, but it’s not all that surprising. And if you’re going to depress me with all of this gloominess, the least you can do is upturn my expectations a little.

Rum Diary

Something went wrong with this, but it’s hard to say what. It has everything going for it. Famous source material, big time movie star lead, likeable supporting cast, exotic location. All winning ingredients. But the story feels like a series of subplots without any kind of main plot. So nothing hooks you in, nothing gets you excited or fulfilled, and there’s nothing to resolve at the end. Plus the tone is uncomfortably inconsistent. It jumps from silliness to melancholy for no apparent dramatic reason. It’s hard to tell if everyone making the move was on the same page, literally.

The Thing

The filmmakers of this prequel have a FUNDAMENTAL misunderstanding of what made the John Carpenter movie so great. The creature in John Carpenter’s paranoid masterpiece imitates humans. Therefore, like the other guys stranded in Antarctica, you never know who has been snatched by the thing and who hasn’t. This is where the suspense comes from. But in this catastrophic rehash, the creature is always in its slimy, mutating, goopy phase, and never seems to successfully imitate anything. Poof! There goes the suspense, dumbass remakers.

Ides of March

What’s funny about this movie, it feels like it was written 50 years ago. The scandal, the catalyst for the movie’s low-impact intrigue, seems relatively tame compared to today’s real-world Jack Abramoffs and war profiteers. Though she’s a competent performer, Evan Rachel Wood’s intern-in-trouble character feels like she fell out of a 1950’s propaganda film about teens in trouble. Everyone in the cast is solid, and it’s well-directed by Clooney, but the movie doesn’t say a lot about today’s political world that we didn’t already know.

Real Steel

It’s a family-friendly cobbling of all the boxing movies, with, ya know, robots. There’s lots of Rocky, plenty of The Champ, a little bit of Raging Bull, and some recognizable stuff from the robot greats: Wall-E, Short Circuit, Robocop. So it’s about as original as a Big Mac. But I got a kick out of it, mainly because of the adults: Hugh Jackman, Evangeline Lilly, Hope Davis and James Rebhorn. I think it’s the sign of a good actor when they can take a script as corny and derivative as this and commit whole-heartedly to its reality. Never winking, never tongue in cheek. The exception to this: the villains. I laughed out loud every time the wicked, Russian, robot-owning vixen spoke. She made me nostalgic for Brigitte Nielsen. Anyway, I went into this expecting a movie about boxing robots. My expectations were fulfilled.

50/50

I’ll admit it: I’m Seth Rogened out. It seems like he’s been in too many movies lately playing the same kind of role. But if all of that was a warm-up for 50/50, maybe it was worth it. As the producer and actor, Rogen plays himself, gives himself the best part, and owns the best scene in the movie. Everyone in the cast is first-rate, elevating the script from a C+ dramedy into a B+ Oscar baiter. It’s neither the directing, the writing nor the cancer concept that makes it special. It’s the fact that the story is personal that makes it emotionally honest. It’s unusual, too, that the main character, played perfectly by Joseph Gordon-Levitt, is so atypically plain. He’s not exceptional in way. He doesn’t have an interesting job. He doesn’t have some great calling in life. He’s not hilarious. In fact, the only thing vaguely unique about him is he has a pretty girlfriend -- a thankless role rendered skillfully and unselfishly by Bryce Dallas Howard. Howard’s shrew is juxtaposed beautifully by Anna Kendrick’s plucky young shrink. The cup is almost full here. A lot of talented youngsters have tried to nail down a James L. Brooks style dramedy tearjerker with mixed results. For every Up in the Air and 500 Days of Summer, there’s a Funny People. 50/50 manages to be more like the former than the latter.

Moneyball

** Spoilers galore **

I really got hooked into the first half of this. The “nerds rule” sentiment, hiring the chubby geek to crunch the numbers while Joe-Handsome tracks down the players was fascinating. I couldn’t wait for the equation to be solved; for the bad news bears to coalesce into the baseball powerhouse the geek hero predicted they would be. But Moneyball is based on a true story, so unfortunately they must be factual. Which is to say that, apparently, the whole thing was a fluke. Not really the best way to end a sports movie…

Drive

Drive feels more like a study than a movie. An exercise in film noir, running down a check-list of film noir ingredients but without any kind of emotional point. The filmmakers don’t seem to understand L.A. in a real way. All the particulars about L.A., Hollywood, and its residents seems to be hastily lifted from old detective novels. Yes, it's violent. No more than anything else. But the violence is frustrating because it's uncharacteristically brutal, lacking any kind of dramatic or ironic point. Nebulous plot, unmotivated characters, and not much driving for a movie called "drive." The only thing that makes it "artsy" is the weird, French carnival music that plays during some of the action scenes, which made me roll my eyes. And it’s replete with Dutch angles. I could practically hear the director screaming for more Dutch angels. It’s not all bad. It had potential. It was fun to see Albert Brooks as a stab-happy villain. And there’s a bitchin’ scene in an elevator. But… meh.

Contagion

Should be required viewing for anyone who doesn’t “believe in” vaccinations. It’s an excellent piece of sci-fi. A potent and realistic “what-if” tracking a badass virus, and the way people would react to it. The resolution is optimistic, but Steven Soderbergh and company aren’t afraid to dramatize the dickheads of the calamity, too, thus creating a strong cautionary tale NOT about how to treat a bad-ass virus, but about how to treat each other.

Warrior

Rocky meets Rich Man, Poor Man. It’s 1976 all over again. Nick Nolte’s even in it! Warrior is well-intentioned, with a big heart. The script is hokey, but it’s strongly directed and vigorously acted. The cinematography bugged me a little. There’s always something in the foreground -- a head, an object, a hand. It’s an attempt to give the movie a POV, to make it gritty and real. But it’s overdone by about 10%. Details about Mixed Martial Arts fighting feel well-researched, but the heavy hands of the filmmakers force-feed the griminess, which makes certain settings feel inauthentic. Overall, Warrior aspires for and mostly achieves deep emotion, which will make it well-respected, but doesn’t guarantee a long box office life.

The Debt

There are parallel stories here: one in the past and one in the present. The one in the past is the “A” plot, and the one in the present is the “B” plot. But it should have been the other way around. Because the “B” plot in the present has Helen Mirren in it, ready and willing wrap-up some unfinished business with an old Nazi. And that’s the fun part, watching the old Jewish Mossad agent grappling with the evil, arthritic Nazi. The stuff in the past, though necessary, drags on way too long. So bits of this were good. It’s like saying the main course was bland, but the desert was DELICIOUS.

Don't Be Afraid of the Dark

Creepy little animals that look like rats with monkey heads torment a family for no particular reason. Of course, no one in this movie has ever seen a movie before, so the parents don’t believe the little girl when she says she sees monsters in the house. And when there’s pretty clear evidence that there ARE monsters in the house, they don’t get the fuck out of the house! There’s nothing wrong with the execution, per se, it’s just a flawed premise from the get-go.

Attack the Block

The twist on the alien invasion genre, the attack happens in a London housing project plagued by petty, teenage criminals. There are a few pleasant surprises, but overall the movie’s too impressed with it’s own concept and fails to build an interesting story or a suspenseful plot. The rough and tumble, “Guy Richie” yobs keep you watching, which makes for a fun night, even if it’s clear this movie will not resonate for one second past the end credits.

Fright Night

Too dark! “But Doug! Shouldn’t a vampire movie BE dark??” Well, I don’t mean thematically dark. I mean the 3-D was too dark, and I couldn’t really see the action. Granted, there are some cool 3-D shots near the end, but I guess I’d rather actually SEE the movie. So far this year, Colin Ferrell played a Russian prisoner in the meathody drama The Way Back. Then he played one of the Horrible Bosses. So the guy’s versatile – I’ll give him that. He’s the best thing about Fright Night, which is an ordinary, suburban campfire tale with nothing new to add to the formula.

30 Minutes or Less

I wanted to like this. But I’ve decided I’m not a fan of Danny McBride. The Foot Fist Way was too long ago, and it’s time Danny McBride portrayed someone other than the loathsome rednecks he embodies in every single movie. The supporting characters in this are funny. Aziz Ansari milks every scene he’s in and manages to come out unscathed. Nick Swardson has a few funny moments, too. Too bad the movie wasn’t about them.

The Guard

Getting to know Brendan Gleeson’s corrupt foul-mouthed Irish cop is hilarious, and it makes the first half of The Guard a hoot. The plot and directing are on par for this kind of low-budget import. Nothing fancy. Don Cheadle makes a worthy foil and overall it’s a fun night, even if you can’t understand the dialogue because either a: the Irish accents are too strong, or b: you’re laughing too much.

Rise of the Planet of the Apes

It’s difficult to say why I liked this so much. It’s full of surprises. The protagonist is not James Franco, or one of the other humans. The protagonist is Caesar, the one lucky chimp who survived a cruel medical trial. He’s the underdog, and he spends the first half of the movie getting kicked around by humans and apes alike. But he wants what EVERY animal wants, human or ape: he wants freedom. And he has what everyone wants: super intelligence. It’s a tasty dish of cold vengeance to watch him manipulate his way to the top of the food chain, while humankind manages to self destruct. A lot of the credit for the success Caesar's sympathetic ordeal should go to Andy Serkis, the performance capture artist who helped make Caesar the most subtle and complicated non-human character since "Wall-E." Everything about this was good, but again, I’m not sure why. Maybe I haven’t seen enough good movies lately. Or maybe I needed a really good underdog story. Or maybe Rise of the Planet of the Apes is just really well-made.

Cowboys and Aliens

Yep, I saw it again.

Cowboys and Aliens

It’s a happy and inspired marriage of genres. But the gimmick is the fusion, without bringing anything new to the individual genres themselves. In other words, aliens are still slimy and roach-like, cowboys are still tough and trigger happy, and Indians are still quiet and noble. It seems like it might be time to get some new aliens. Battle: Los Angeles, Super 8, and Falling Skies all have slimy, gross, roachy aliens. If they’re so much more advanced than we are, how come they’re not more evolutionarily advanced? Westerns and alien invasion movies are the quintessential Saturday matinee/b-movie genres. It makes sense that the filmmakers here would stick to the conventions of each genre, assuming that each one would compliment the other. But a hybrid should also be an improvement over the individual parts, and while this is a successful effort to fulfill all the Saturday matinee/b-movie requirements, there doesn’t seem to be much effort to improve on them. Then again, maybe I’m getting way too over-analytical. Maybe I should stop thinking, eat some popcorn, and behold Harrison Ford kill some aliens.

Friends with Benefits

We were supposed to see Another Earth, but the start time got botched. So we saw this instead. That's the end of this sad, sad story.

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows - Part 2

The final installment has some great filmmaking. Production design is perfect, shots linger beautifully, and the music soars. I’ll admit, most of it didn’t make a lot of sense to me. The J.K. Rowling/lame plotting that I always complain about still rears it’s ugly dragonhead from time to time. But it’s a cinematic wonder watching those kids grow up in their characters, and watching digital effects mature and grow over the years, too. It’s a testament to the imaginative and detailed world created by Rowling that it would become such a beloved series in spite of the amateurish, 5th grade-level plotting.

Captain America: The First Avenger

Joe Johnston is great at the corny nostalgia. It’s a gift, really. Chris Evans was cast perfectly and the “little Steve” segments were technically amazing. It seemed like it was probably a good movie. I was at the theatre. Really. But I couldn’t actually SEE the movie, because it was WAY TOO DARK. I kept having to lift up my 3-D glass just to see what was going on. Maybe I should see it again in 2-D so I can actually perceive the action on screen.

The Trip

Could be called, "My Dinner With Coogan." It’s a funny but plotless series of episodes with comedian Steve Coogan driving around the English countryside and dining with comedian Rob Brydon. The point seems to be that the people who are your best friends are often the biggest pains in your ass. Or the converse, which is no matter how big of a pain in the ass a friend is, it sure beats eating alone.

Horrible Bosses

Who HASN’T wanted to kill their boss?? A great comedy because it’s structured really tightly like a good thriller. There’s a lot of hysterical twists and pay-offs to things you never would have expected. The cast is fantastic. The repartee is like jazz and always skillfully plays into the plot. It’s a coming out party for Charlie Day, who blasts into movie star orbit with his neurotic, free-form rages. Bateman is in top form at his driest and dead-paniest. I laughed all the way through. So, so, SO much better than The Hangover, I wanna grab the world and shake it and scream, “See!? This is comedy!”

Buck

Buck is a well-meaning doc about the real horse whisperer. Interviews with Buck Brannaman, Robert Redford and various family and friends reveal Buck had an abusive father. Buck uses his experience being abused to try and empathize with naughty horses, and it becomes clear that Buck is using horse training as his own therapy. What’s unfortunate is the series of events doesn’t seem to be in the right order for a doc. Small victories occur early on and major setbacks happen near the end, which makes the whole thing a downer. Seems to me that the doc would want to end on an up note, with a small victory for Buck. Does that make me sentimental? Or just commercially pragmatic?

Bad Teacher

Funny! Funnier than Bridesmaids. I laughed a lot. What’s peculiar, it’s not a very well-made movie. There’s not a lot of filmmaking craft. There’s no mind-blowing direction or shots, there’s no fantastically ribald set pieces. It’s pretty bland visually. But it’s funny. Cameron Diaz and the rest of the cast got it done. It’s all in the delivery.

Transformers: Dark of the Moon

I said it before: it’s a tragedy. So many HUNDREDS or maybe THOUSANDS of technicians obviously worked extremely hard building the sets, crashing the cars, and creating some of the best cg effects ever seen in a movie. When a giant robotic phallus eats an office building, the amount of detail is astonishing. Office supplies are flying everywhere! The sheer amount of work is awesome. Therefore the tragedy is: why couldn’t that much work be put into the script? Because the story is SOOOO STUPID! So, so, so UNBELIEVABLY stupid! Even for a giant, fighting robots movie, it’s a travesty.

The Double Hour

On tonight’s arthouse menu: herring. How would you like it? Atlantic? Italian? Red, perhaps?

The Devil's Double

A ballsy, guns-a-blazin’ depiction of Uday Hussein and his reluctant body double during the first Gulf War. British actor Dominic Cooper plays both parts and he NAILS it, drawing superb distinctions between the two men, one a quiet, decent and dutiful soldier and one the psychopathic rapist son of a megalomaniacal, murderous dictator. Director Lee Tamahori aims for a true-life Scarface, but embellishments abound in a calculated effort to gloss over the horrible truth of Uday Hussein’s barbarism and spin an over-the-top piece of pulp fiction. It’s a well-made movie, but also a pro-war, “These guys had it comin’...” agitation, akin to, but not quite equal to, Inglorious Basterds.

Pirates of the Carribbean: On Stranger Tides

It’s like… It’s like… It’s like… Disney tried to make a “Pirates” movie WITHOUT Gore Verbinsky! (sigh.) This is a cautionary tale about how important a director’s vision can be. You can throw all the money, effects, cast and Johnny Depp’s amazing Jack Sparrow character into a stew, and if Gore Verbinsky isn’t the chef, for some reason, it just doesn’t taste right. It’s hard to say WHY, but there’s something missing.

The Green Lantern

Flash Gordon (1980) < Ghost Rider < Superman 3 < The Punisher (2004) < The Fantastic Four < Electra < Batman and Robin < Spawn < The Green Hornet < The Shadow < Blade: Trinity < Wolverine < The Green Lantern < Daredevil < Thor < Watchmen < Superman Returns < The Incredible Hulk < Blade < X-Men: First Class < Superman 2 < Iron Man < Hellboy 2: The Golden Army < Batman (1989) < X-Men 2 < Batman Begins < The Crow < The Dark Knight < The Incredibles < Hulk(2003) < Superman < Spiderman 2

Super 8

The second tribute to the Spielberg catalog of space movies this year, after Paul. It’s a nostalgia soup, focused more on invoking memories of the past than actually producing a compelling narrative. It’s very well-made, the performances are good and it’s enjoyable. But the plot lacks sophisticated science fiction. The alien’s methods and motives are unclear, and the conclusion is harried and muddled. Even the attempts at Spielbergian sentiment feel rushed and clumsy; an imitation rather than the genuine article. It’s still a good movie, though. Maybe attempting to emulate classic movies will at least yield a good movie? Here’s hoping J.J. Abrams will move on from flattery and into individuality.

I Am

Filmmaker of comedies, Tom Shadyac, fell on his head, had an epiphany and decided to make a film about it. It’s a vague thesis about how we should quit accumulating financial wealth, we should live within our means, we should quit waging war and be nicer to each other, exercise more, etc. It’s a noble effort I suppose, but a real scattershot doc.

X-Men: First Class

At times it has a funny, Austin Powers/James Bond/Mad Men retro vibe. It’s well-made, fast paced, and at times, surprisingly violent. The performances from the new kids and the non-stars are all top notch. There’s a showy performance from Kevin Bacon as the main villain. There are also some quick but pleasant reminders of the Brian Singer movies. It’s a serious and respectful adaptation of the hero comic, grounded in the realistic era of the Cuban Missile Crisis. It’s a fun night at the movies.

Kung Fu Panda II

More manic and more hyper than the original, this sequel still offers some funny physical comedy and some excellent animated Kung Fu. I only wish that they would hold on a shot for a while longer. Because live-action fighting has to be cut up to make it physically possible, animated fighting should do the opposite. The script is pat and archetypal. Like X-Men: First Class, the story features a lot of philosophy 101 about “making peace with your past will make you a better fighter.” It seems oxymoronic, but hey, as long as there’s cartoon violence, who cares how we get there.

Midnight in Paris

It’s terrific to see Owen Wilson in this role. The Oscar nominated screenwriter playing -- a screenwriter and Woody Allen’s surrogate/neurotic leading man. But Wilson brings a WHOLE different energy to the Woody Allen signature quirks and rhythms. His laid-back Texas style makes Woody’s uptight and tense comedy slide down as easy as an ice cold Shiner Bock. Woody’s writing here is also refreshing. He doesn’t get bogged down with explanations for supernatural twists. There’s no Jeff Goldblum-type scientist forcing a bunch of science fiction gibberish down our throats about how time travel could possibly happen. It just HAPPENS and we accept it. Great! The last Woody Allen movie I saw was Match Point, which I hated. The addition of Owen Wilson to the Woody Allen ensemble is an inspired success.

Tree of Life

It’s impossible to describe this contemplative, meditative chronicle of family life in Texas in the 1950’s. It’s non-linear, abstract, but also a strongly-themed montage about the significance of life and death on Earth. People expecting a traditional plot will hate it. It’s like a nature film, except instead of frogs or cheetahs as the subject, it’s humans. “Watch the young, male humans compete for dominance in the pride. Now watch them play. See them frolic with their mother as their father is away on a hunt.” It’s extremely ambitious, and unlike a lot of movies, never underestimates the intelligence or the emotional capacity of its audience. It’s beautifully made and gloriously filmed. It’s also way too long and frustratingly oblique. But however you slice it, Tree of Life definitely provokes a lot of juicy, after-the-movie conversation, which makes it worth seeing, but riskily divisive.

The Hangover 2

** SPOILERS AHEAD **

Reminded me a lot of Rush, Blow, Sid and Nancy, and Requiem for a Dream. It’s a stark drama about the toll that drug and alcohol abuse can take on an entire family and community. The trio of addicts featured here seem to regret their decisions and the consequences, but never express any desire to seek help. The tragedy depicts a never-ending cycle of despair resulting in, like Requiem for a Dream, a character losing a limb – shattering his limitless potential as a cellist and surgeon. This drama of destructive excess and the ruins left when the main characters lives descend in to a maelstrom of booze and pills offers no comfort or solutions, but only holds up a mirror to the reality of binging and addiction.

On a strange side note, the end credits of this searing portrait of drug abuse are incongruously humorous – funny even – and might fit better into a movie that was intended to be a comedy.

Win Win

It’s a tribute to Paul Giamatti that he can play such a flawed but relatable character. Fueled by greed and financial desperation, he’ll screw-over a helpless old man and you can still root for him for an entire movie. His first acts of selfishness don’t lead to negative consequences, but to unexpected circumstances. These unexpected twists are what make the movie special and worth seeing. The acting from the entire cast is great. Big, big kudos go to Alex Shaffer, an actual high school wrestler, apparently, who’s never acted in a movie before now and turns in a low-key, unaffected performance better than most seasoned actors his age. Kudos, too, to Burt Young – still alive and kicking, and still delivering real characters. It’s a worthwhile and unique family drama.

Bridesmaids

The premise and story aren’t interesting – they aren’t intended to be. They’re only a means to loosely tie together a structure so that the screenwriter and star Kristen Wiig can perform shtick. I laughed at some of the shtick. But if she’s going to stay in the zeitgeist, she’s going to have to hunt down projects with higher, sillier concepts than Bridesmaids. The Waterboy, Blades of Glory and Smiley Face come to mind.

The Beaver

It’s an interesting and courageous drama, helmed by ballsy Jodie Foster, who, throughout her career, has never shied away from the weird or unsavory. Despite the title, the casting of Mel Gibson and the ridiculous premise, the Beaver is not a comedy. It’s a serious portrait of a psychologically damaged person and the collateral damage to his family. Besides the alcoholism, you will not find too many other parallels between Mel Gibson and the forlorn father he plays. But his personal life and struggles with alcohol are all the more tragic knowing that, behind it all, there’s a pretty decent actor.

Thor

A fun comic book take with cool, otherworldly visuals, some decent acting and some great acting. Kenneth Branagh must have pulled some favors from his Shakespearean-trained pals, because the Frost Giants, villains determined to destroy Thor’s heavenly home, were BADASS and damned articulate. Anthony Hopkins was especially good, too. I didn’t carry too much away from this. It’s no great metaphor for anything. It’s no Spiderman 2. But it’s fun to watch.

Fast Five

There’s more homoerotic tension between Dwayne Johnson and Vin Diesel than there was in Top Gun and all of the Lord of the Rings movies combined. The Oceans Eleven heist device seems like a good fit to transition to from all of the drag racing. But the filmmakers still whitewash the hundreds of innocent bystanders who were certainly killed during the climactic police chase/Armageddon in the streets of Rio so the protagonists could escape and buy brand new Italian sports cars. Here’s hoping that in the opening minutes of Fast 6 some of their stolen loot goes to the families of the Brazilian victims in remembrance of that horrible summer day.

Insidious

In Poltergeist, what if you actually got to SEE what JoBeth Willams saw when she went into the netherworld to find Carol-Anne? That’s the elevator pitch of Insidious, the low-budget profit machine from the director of Saw and the Producers of Paranormal Activity. The typical floating objects and jump scares are effectively hair-raising, but expected. The twists that pile on at the end reminded me of the great SNL/Andy Samberg/Ellen Page short The Mirror. Overall, it’s a noble testament to bloodless, PG-13 spookiness and a nice homage to Tobe Hooper’s classic.

Rio

There are millions of different colors in Rio, and one individual color never seems to repeat anywhere. The script is nothing special – it feels cobbled together from pieces of other, greater animated scripts. But man! Rio seems to use every single possible color visible in the electromagnetic spectrum to great effect, if you’re not counting the paint-by-numbers story.

Scream 4

Just don’t answer the phone, ladies. It’s that simple. Don’t answer the phone, and the killer can’t play out his evil script. But I guess the people that reside in Kevin Williamson and Wes Craven’s Scream 4 world don’t have voice mail. If they did, would there be a movie? The hapless residents also don’t seem to have any peripheral vision, either, because the killer almost always comes from the side. It seems like if there was killer this omnipotent and prolific, Dewey the sheriff would have a hotline to either the FBI or the National Guard. Dewey is well-meaning, but he can only do so much -- especially with a series of killers who can all disguise their voices in the exact same way. If there’s a different killer in each movie, shouldn’t their evil phone voices sound slightly different? Maybe I just miss Jamie Kennedy too much. No one could explain the rules of horror movies better than he could. I certainly can’t.

Source Code

No sophomore slump for Duncan Jones, director of Moon. Source Code is a taut, suspenseful and well-executed sci-fi thriller with a lot of big ideas about fate. The premise isn’t mind-blowingly original and neither is the resolution, but Jones, Ben Ripley and company are teeming with competence, which is more than you can ask for these days. The cast is strong, the pace is brisk, the look is cool and it gives a little hope for humanity. Not a bad night at the movies. Looking forward to the next big thing from these guys.

Your Highness

As I am writing this weblog entry, I am stoned out of my mind. Being stoned makes me hilarious and brilliant. I’m sure you, gentle reader, are amazed by how hilarious I am, whether you are stoned or not. As I write my brilliant and hilarious critique of Your Highness, I’m truly in awe of how articulate and clever I am. Marijuana in no way affects or inhibits my ability to judge my own hilarity. I am a genius, and pot just fertilizes the already fertile ground that is my hysterically funny imagination. Laugh, my children! Laugh heartily! I need no filter!

Hanna

It’s not really clear what Hanna, the vicious teen assassin, wants. All of her goals are very oblique. She wants to reunite with her father. She wants to hear music. She wants to kiss boys and be a hippie. In the lexicon of teen assassins, "Hit Girl" from Kick Ass is far more motivated. She wants REVENGE and she’ll kill anyone in her way to get it. Hanna’s a little too touchy-feely. Despite exceptional performances from the cast, Hanna needs to murder a lot more people for me to care.

Sucker Punch

Emily Browning plays an innocent stripper with a heart of gold who is SO sexy and SO sensual that any time she dances for men she can hypnotize them. And the movie NEVER shows her dancing. As soon as she’s about to dance, they cut away to her inner fantasy world, where she and her squad of fetishistic nymphs run combat missions in various “manga” fantasy worlds, shooting soldiers, killing Nazi robots, and repelling from various flying machines in dramatically tight-fitting leather underwear. The filmmakers believe we would rather see this than Emily Browning’s sexy dancing. So that’s really a toss-up. What’s funny is the sexuality of the nymphs is never portrayed. Dramatically speaking, they’re asexual, and the skimpy outfits are really just a cinematic fallacy, tricking us into watching the battle. It’s all a metaphor for something I think, but I’m not sure what. I bet Filmmaker Zach Snyder knows. Every second of this movie feels deliberate. Every frame is picture perfect, every sound and every music cue are relentlessly intentional. It’s a beautiful movie to watch and to experience. You can sit back and relax and trust that the filmmakers have seen to every single detail. Except one: Sucker Punch doesn’t make sense AT ALL! So I can’t recommend it.

Paul

Lots of swearing in this sweet, funny, and sometimes groan-inducingly obvious love-letter to the Spielberg and Lucas space movies. Kristen Wiig stands out in the funny cast mainly because she actually gets to play a character instead of a one-dimensional, scene-stealing goofball, like in previous movies. So for the most part, I liked this. But I am getting tired of Seth Rogen. He’s in too many things. I feel bad for Linda Cardellini. Where the hell is she? Of all the Freaks and Geeks alums, she’s due for a career jolt.

Battle: Los Angeles

Wants to be Black Hawk Down with aliens. But the script never expounds upon who the aliens are, what they want, or how to kill them. Remember in Predator? The discoveries? “It can’t see me if I’m covered in mud.” None of that here. One guy hits an alien on the left side and that enough for the grunts to conclude, “That must be where the heart is!” Another guy just guesses, a stab in the dark, “They must want our water!” Shouldn’t there be a scientist, a Jeff Goldblum type, to explain all of this? There isn’t. Well-filmed, hand-held battle scenes don’t necessarily yield an interesting movie.

Rango

I’m not sure who will see this unusual and affecting movie. It almost seems pointless to say these days, because most animated movies continue to amaze me, (Me, the guy who grew up watching Scooby Doo…) but the animation is awesome. The majestic lighting, the expressive faces of the characters and the lopsided camera angles are a sensory feat. But there’s also an outlaw sensibility here; a different way to skin a cat -- a cerebral one. Hunter S. Thompson, spaghetti western and Chinatown references seem much more geared toward film-literate adults than kids or families. It’s a miracle this even got green-lit except that Gore Verbinsky has made a LOT of money for a LOT of people. How is it that this script didn’t get bogged down in studio story notes?? There’s barely any internal logic, even for animation. (Some birds talk, but others are for riding horseback?) It's scary. It's dark. It’s existential. It’s about finding meaning in your life. Who wants that from their family animation? But I LAUGHED -- more than I’ve laughed at most comedies. More than I laughed during Black Swan. And that’s really saying something, because I loved Black Swan and I thought it was hysterical. So, I’m not sure how they’re going to market this movie, and I’m not sure who’s going to see it, but it’s not really my job to worry about those things, is it? I just know that it made my cranky soul cackle, in spite of myself, with bemused joy.

Black Swan

Thoroughly enjoyed my second viewing. Marvelled in Barabara Hershey’s performance again, and noticed more closely the nightclub scene when everything changes.

Cedar Rapids

A funny variation of The Hangover, if it took place in Iowa. The ensemble cast (Ed Helms, Anne Heche, John C. Reilly, Alia Shawkat, Isiah Whitlock Jr., Sigourney Weaver) is genuinely likable and organic. Even though a lot of what's in the screenplay feels typical, Ed Helms nails the quintessential sympathetic dork perfectly, and his sex-and-drug-induced flight from his ordinary world mines a lot of laughs. It's the best comedy I've seen since Machete.

Biutiful

Yeah, yeah. It’s a master class in method acting. Blah, blah, blah. This was by far the most depressing movie I’ve ever seen. This makes Shindler’s List look like Mamma Mia. How many times do we need to see Javier Bardem urinate blood? He’s dying. I get it! And does there have to be a crying baby or a ringing phone in every single scene?! This movie is an exercise in joylessness. I can’t recommend it to anyone for any reason. Have someone kick you in the balls a few times -- you’ll have a better night.

The Mechanic

Jason Statham is at his best when he’s kicking and punching. He’s not quite as poised when he’s shooting, running and or/repelling. Also, it’s fun to hear his soccer hooligan accent as he mouths off, but as they say in life and in screenwriting, don’t let your mouth write checks your butt can’t cash. So that’s my feedback, Jason Statham: more punching.

The Way Home

I’ve always liked Peter Weir, and for the most part I enjoyed this. The cast was great and they all did a bang-up job as the method-acting survivalists. At times it’s very tense and visceral, but there is also shot after shot after shot of the starving escapees crossing tundras and deserts. After a while it gets wearisome. Perhaps that’s the filmaker’s intent?

The Green Hornet

Poorly written. Not very funny. Not very exciting. Not much of a plot. Seth Rogen was all wrong for the part, but the guy who played Kato was good. Some decent montages.

It’s not terrible. It just feels like nobody was trying very hard to make an interesting movie.