Immortals

The stakes are always high when gods, demigods and titans battle for control of the Earth and its weakling population. It’s hard to imagine the battles of gods, but the all-form-and-no-function director Tarsem has a lot of fun when the battles wind up in cramped narrow hallways and elaborately carved caves. Mickey Roarke was deliciously rotten as the power-hungry villain, and the rest of the cast managed not to embarrass themselves. I couldn’t really summarize the plot if I had a gun to my head, even minutes after the movie ended. But it was fun to be in the moment and watch as one demigod beheads another demigod, as the deep crimson blood flies in slow motion across the screen to the tune of some important-sounding music.